The soulbound journey...

Update

Sat, 21 Feb 2009 02:14:19 GMT

Sorry for my last LJ post everyone. I was in another one of my fights with depression. The issue is solved, and I'm talking to my sister.

If anyone in the Edmonton Alberta area can suggest a decent shrink, that would be great, too.

Sliding...

Thu, 19 Feb 2009 07:09:11 GMT

I feel like I'm sliding, slipping through to oblivion... things have gotten better in some places, but worse in others. My relationship with my sister since I moved out has worsened, my friends are annoyed at me when I start randomly singing along with whatever I'm listening to at the time, and I have friends who like me just because they think they can get into my pants. (If you're reading this, you know who you are!) In other news, I've been looking at how un-scarred my wrists are, and wondering what it would be like to just... let go. Would it hurt? Would I just... go to sleep? Is there an after-life, would I come back? Would anyone actually miss me?

I know this has been the topic of my journal of late, but... I may have a problem. I should probably see a shrink and get rid of these voices.. They're starting to get very convincing...

OMG!!!

Thu, 08 May 2008 20:08:27 GMT

OMG!!!! I was on the news yesterday because my dad shaved his whole head. If you were watching the CTV Edmonton news at either 6pm or 11:30, I was there, holding the chopped off end of my dad's ponytail. 25 years since he last shaved, it was an odd scene. If I can find anything about it on the website, I'll add that in.

Privilages

Sat, 05 Jan 2008 08:33:48 GMT

From What Privileges Do You Have?, based on an exercise about class and privilege developed by Will Barratt, Meagan Cahill, Angie Carlen, Minnette Huck, Drew Lurker, Stacy Ploskonka at Indiana State University. If you participate in this blog game, they ask that you PLEASE acknowledge their copyright.

http://wbarratt.indstate.edu/

Bold the true statements.
1. Father went to college
2. Father finished college
3. Mother went to college (Yeah... no.)
4. Mother finished college
5. Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor
6. Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers
7. Had more than 50 books in your childhood home
8. Had more than 500 books in your childhood home
9. Were read children's books by a parent. (My daddy read me The Hobbit ^_^)
10. Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18
11. Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18
12. The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively
13. Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18
14. Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs
15. Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
16. Went to a private high school
17. Went to summer camp
18. Had a private tutor before you turned 18
19. Family vacations involved staying at hotels
20. Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18
21. Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them
22. There was original art in your house when you were a child (Just one picture hanging in the front entrance_
23. You and your family lived in a single family house
24. Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home
25. You had your own room as a child.
26. You had a phone in your room before you turned 18
27. Participated in an SAT/ACT prep course
28. Had your own TV in your room in High School
29. Owned a mutual fund or IRA in High School or College
30. Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16
31. Went on a cruise with your family
32. Went on more than one cruise with your family
33. Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up.
34. You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family.

How old is this exercise, anyway? I think a crucial statement is missing:

35. You had access to a computer at home while growing up. (My mom gave up on trying to take the family computer away from me until I was 18.)

Thu, 18 Oct 2007 05:27:35 GMT

HOW OLD DO U ACT?...
put an X in the ones you do, then add it up and that's your age!

[x] I know how to cook toast
[x] I can do my own laundry.
[x] I can cook for myself.
[x] I actually enjoy intellectual conversations.
[ ] My parents and grandparents have better things to say than my friends.

Total : 4

[ ] I show up for school ALL of the time unless I'm sick.
[x] I always carry a pen in my pocket/purse
[ ] I've never gotten a detention.
[x] I've watched talk shows.
[ ] I drink coffee at least once a week.

Total So Far: 6

[x] I know how to run the dish washer and/or do the dishes.
[x] I can count to 5 in either Spanish/French /German/Italian or your native tounge besides english
[ ] When I say I'm going to do something, I do it.
[ ] My parents trust me.
[ ] I can mow the lawn.
[x] I remember to water my plants.(doesnt mean i'll do it)
[ ] I study when I HAVE to.
[ ] I pay attention at school.
[x] I remember to feed my pets.

Total So far: 10

[x] I can spell experience without looking it up.
[ ] I clean up my own mess without my parents telling me.
[ ] The first thing I do when i get home is eat.
[X] I can go to the store without getting something I don't need.
[ ] I understand jokes the first time they are said.
[x] I can type fast.

Total: 13

[x] I have realized that the weather forecast changes every hour.
[ ] I realize that no one will take you seriously unless you are over the age of 25 and have a job.
[x] I can read a book and actually finish it.

Total : 15

[x] I knew that the alphabet and twinkle twinkle little star have the same rhythem
[x] You just checked
[x] You noticed rhythm is spelled wrong.
[x] you actually watch the weather

GRAND Total: 19

What's your mental age?

Space Colony Atlantis

Sun, 08 Apr 2007 06:53:12 GMT

To boldly go where man has gone before. To transport strange people, and new technology to the Space Colony Atlantis. Captain Christina Kalahan must gather a crew together. The only problem is she has a week. Her life-partner, Alan McLeod, joins the crew to follow her to SCAtlantis. From there, halarious hijinks in Zero-G and on strange planets ensue.

Mon, 18 Dec 2006 18:44:59 GMT

I want to kill them all. Every single one of them. I ask them to leave me the fuck alone, and do they? Noooooo. *grumbles* Right now, I'm in a killing mood. Give me a target, I'll fucking kill them all.

Assholes who aren't supposed to sit at the back of my school bus, I hate them.

Stolen post thing

Wed, 13 Dec 2006 19:44:10 GMT

Copy into a comment. Put X for one's you say yes to.....

[_] Give me your number? (_ _ _) _ _ _- _ _ _ _

[_] Give me your screenname?

[_] Kiss me?

[_] Let me kiss you?

[_] Watch a movie with me?

[_] Go to dinner with me?

[_] Let me drive you somewhere?

[_] Take a shower with me?

[_] Buy me a drink?

[_] Take me home for the night?

[_] Let me sleep in your bed?

[_] Sing car karaoke w/ me?

[_] Re-post this for me to answer your questions?

[_] Come pick me up at 3 am because my car ran out of gas in the middle of nowhere?

[_] Let me make you breakfast?

[_] Help me with homework?

[_] Tickle me?

[_] Let me tickle you?

[_] Stick up for me if i was being put down?

[_] Instant message me?

[_] Greet me in public?

[_] Hang out with me?

[_] Bring me around your friends?

D0 Y0U...

[_] Think im hot?

[_] Think im cute?

[_] Want to kiss me?

[_] Want to hook up with me?

[_] Want to be my bf/gf?

AM I...

[_] Smart?

[_] Cute?

[_] Funny?

[_] Cool?

[_] Loveable?

[_] Adorable?

[_] Great to be with?

[_] Attractive?

[_] Mean?

HAVE Y0U EVER...

[_] Thought about hooking up with me?

[_] Found yourself wanting a kiss from me?

[_] Wished I were there?

[_] Had a crush on me?

[_] Wanted my number?

[_] Had a dream about me?

ARE Y0U...

[_] Happy you know me?

[_] Thinking about me?

[_] Interested in dating me?

[_] Going to repost this?

Our Song for DV

Tue, 05 Dec 2006 19:19:32 GMT

My friend Goldilocks and I started writing a song, or rather a spoof of a song from My Chemical Romance, for a friend of ours. And... here it is.

DV, you going to hell.
DV, you going to hell.
We're writing this letter, to wish you well
DV, you going to hell.

Well now DV, you are going to die
DV, you are going to die.
Stop asking us questions, you never did cry
DV, you are going to die.

And when you go, don't blame us, yeah
You let that fire bathe you, yeah
You were never that famous;
You'll never be let go
And when you go, do not return, you tall jerk.

DV, you are full of lies.
DV, you are meant for the flies!
And right now, I'm building a coffin your size.
DV, you are full of lies.

Well, DV, what the fight did to my spirit and to my life
You should have thought of that before.
You should have been a better friend
If you could counter the infection
They can amputate at once
You should've been
You should've been a better friend.

And when you go, don't blame us, yeah
You let that fire bathe you, yeah
You were never all that famous
You'll never be let go.

We said "You ain't no friend of ours,
For what you did before
You'll find a, a place for you.
And just you mind your manners when you go."

And when you go, do not return you tall jerk.
That's right.

DV, you going to hell
DV, you going to hell
It isn't that pleasent, except for the smell
DV, you going to hell.

It isn't done yet, but this is the jist of it ^_^ DV, you had better enjoy you jerk.

Stupid fucking bitch...

Sun, 03 Dec 2006 08:26:48 GMT

Alright, I was talking to one of my friends on MSN when this bitch just starts insulting me. I end up insulting her back and getting calmer and calmer about it until I'm at the stage where I'm freeking my friend out, since she was sitting like six feet from me at the time. I was starting to freak myself out for a while there, since I really thought that I was going to totally snap and murder someone. That's not good.

Isolation

Thu, 16 Nov 2006 19:06:34 GMT

Have you ever had that feeling, when you're in class or at work, that no one notices that you're alive? That you're some how seperated from the world by a wall? What causes this feeling of speration, of isolation?

I think it's just how people fuck with our lives. I mean, really! How the hell does anyone expect to get anything done when they're behind a glass wall all the time. It's degrading, walking through the halls in my school, sitting in my classrooms, and feeling this way.

I wonder if I'm alone in this, but I doubt it. Shout out if you're with me.

A lock-down?

Fri, 29 Sep 2006 21:12:18 GMT

Yesterday, while I was at school, we had an interesting, yet scary thing happen. Someone within the school had made a threatening comment sometime, either yesterday or Wensday, we don't know when, and caused some trouble.

Another incident, which is completely unrelated is the tightened security within the school because of some notes written on school property.

I'm scared. I shouldn't be writing this, but I am, because I don't know what's going on. I don't want to know. I hope that this is just a copy cat and not a real threat.

Sat, 23 Sep 2006 02:38:53 GMT

I felt like doing some online quizes. Here are a few of my answers.

What type of Fae are you?

Well, I'ma dark elf XD that's awesome.

</a>

I'm Duo Maxwell!

Which Gundam Wing Character Are You?

by Quistis</font></center>

I'm Duo again! Woohoo.

Take the Villain quiz.

Blah.

You're fire! In general you're not a mean person but you can be very quick tempered, and boy, WHAT A TEMPER YOU CAN HAVE. You are angered very easily and you sometimes have anti-social habits.

What element are you?

Huzzah

You're Halloween! You like being creepy and gothy. ^_^ You're also the holiday most associated with candy...yay for you! Just don't eat too much candy or you'll turn into a big round ball! >_<

What 'Hallmark' Holiday are you?

Bweee!!

You're Venus! Venus is the planet second from the sun and named after the Roman goddess of love. Venus is the brightest planet in the sky and also very very hot. Sorry, no moons for you. :(

What Planet are you?</center>

Gyah!! I don't want to be venus!

Prompts

Thu, 21 Sep 2006 20:31:42 GMT

I decided that I'm going to go with my Nanowrimo-sister DLD is doing with her LJ and posting prompts for Nano. I might not update as often as she does, but it's worth a try.

Prompt: In 500 words or less, write about the ravages of war from the point of view of a soldier.

I see trees, both standing tall, silent sentinels against the sky, and dead on the ground, stretched out in eternal sleep. I smell the wet scent of the swollen river, running over its banks, brown and full of debris. The silence pressed down on me on all sides. The sounds of the ever present gunshots faded with distance, leaving a lifeless land ravaged by war.

I taste the metallic coppery fluid of my blood in my mouth. I felt the still of the air, so thick you could slice it with a knife. Our packs were heavy, adding to the pressure the silence created. My comrades in arms have almost all left me to fend for myself in this oppression.

My feet were sore and swollen, my boots several sizes too small. My uniform was heavy with the rain that had been falling since the day we started here. Our boots echoed on the bridge, a set patter of left-right-left-right. We were shaky with exhaustion, many of us that lived stumbling through the mud.

A breath of breeze brought to my nose the odour of decay from the battlefield. Smoke, sulphur, gunpowder, and sweat filled my senses as we marched on. Our last post, a war torn land, brought to peace through violence. If anything could be hell, it was this place, this ravaged landscape of Death and Destruction.

Random Quiz thing

Sat, 16 Sep 2006 04:05:51 GMT

Sickness... not fun...

Sat, 16 Sep 2006 00:39:58 GMT

For the last few days, I've been sick, without an appitite, and just this evening, the thought of food has made me ill. I don't know what it is, but now my sister is sick as well. At least she can still eat. As well, I'm tired, irritable, and almost throwing up. I don't think I'm going shopping with my mom and sister tomorrow unless I get more sleep tonight...

Survey time!

Tue, 29 Aug 2006 16:18:06 GMT

This one I yanked from my journal over on Deadjournal.com. Gotta love a place where people won't even read my rants. Heehee.

What's your name? Alayna Garrison

Age: Holy crap! I'm almost 18!

Marital status: I wish there was someone in my life right now...

Weight: How many quizzes are going to ask me this?

Where are you at the moment? Waiting for people to come online...

Any nicknames? Alaria, Kitten

Who do you like at the moment: I have a couple of people, but they don't really return my affections...

What are you eating/drinking at the moment? My tongue.

WHO DO YOU LIKE: I'm single, alright?

Your favorite song? Hall om Mig

Your favorite color(s)? Red, Gold, Silver, Black, white.

Your least favorite color(s)? Ummmm.... bright, pepto-bismol pink, or neon pink...

Someone you can't live without? All my friends. Mainly Keiji though. He's my brother.

Something you can't live without? MY BOOKS! If I couldn't read anything, I think I would die.

A show you have to watch? Class of the Titans

Song you are listening to at the moment? Hmmm... I don't know what it's called, it's on a filk tape.

Do you have a hero? Keiji, my brother, is my hero. I don't need to tell him what to do, since we're so close now.

Something that means alot to you? Hmmmm... My brother and quasi-boyfriend, Joey.

Your favorite smilee on msn? my personal emoticon: XD

Sooo, who do you like? >>

If you could bring someone back to life, who would it be? I would like to see Jeff again, but I know that human alchemy is against the laws of equivilent exchange. I won't risk it.

Hottest person you've ever seen? Several people.

What's the best smell on someone of the opposite sex? Freshly washed hair.

What turns you on? Hot accent, mainly british and austrailian accents.

Name 2 things you don't like about yourself? My weight and my voice.

What's more important to you??

Looks or personality? Personality. So much hotter than looks. Though, if someone has like... a serious case of acne, there's no way I'm dating them.

Music or TV? Music is so much more insperational.

Friends or Lovers? Both actually. If you are in love, then good for you. Friends will support you as will a lover.

Friends or family? Both. See above answer.

Losin your virginity to someone whos mad hot or
someone that you like alot? Ummmm.... someone who you like alot, though I wouldn't know...

Parties or night out wit your friends? Friends, all the way... cuz at parties, you can get drunk, then someone can rape you!! Don't go to parties! Parties are evil... unless you're at a party with your friends. Hmmm... interesting delemma...

Love or money? Love.

Food or dignity? Foood!!

Sex or cuddling: Ummm, cuddling...

Punk or rap? Eeeew... crap is crap... Punk sucks too, but it's better than that crap.

Someone that can turn you on easily or someone that can make you laugh? Someone who can make me laugh. Jokes can be as much of a turn on as hotness.

Snow sports or water sports? Water... I try to stay inside as much as possible during the winter... Though I do like skiiing.

Getting stoned or getting drunk? Stoned is not fun...

Someone that dresses skimpy or someone that dresses normal ? Normal! I'm sorry, but some people I know dress skimpy... and do I have to mention Man-Faye?

If you were to die tomorrow, name 3 things you would do? Well, if getting teleporting powers were part of this, I would go kiss Joey and Keiji, kick DV in the ass, and hug Nicole. All this for supporting me.

If you could see someone right now, who would it be? Either Joey or Keiji.

If you had anything to tell anyone knowing you would die tomorrow, what would it be? "Please, don't grieve too long. You guys have a life. Mine was just cut shorter than yours."

How many times a day, around, do you think of something dirty? Suprising enough, I don't anymore. Or at least I don't notice it.

What's the best quality on someone of the other sex? You can learn alot of stuff about someone by looking in their eyes.

Any last words??? Hmmmmmm... nope.

what's under your bed: Pffft. The floor.

what time did you wake up today: 9:30am

current hair: dyed black

current clothes: bra and skirt... it's summer, I tell you!

current annoyance: Nothing. Well, other than the fact that I want it to be november already. Damn writing bug!

current longing: For more NOVEMBER!!

current favorite music artist: None.

current worry: That I won't finish my novel.

current hate: Nothing.

current favorite articles of clothing: None.

favorite physical feature on a boy: eyes.

i am happiest when: Talking to Joey.

if you could live anywhere in the world, where: England... then I could be closer to Joey.

famous person you have met: OMG!!! KIRBY MORROW TOUCHED ME!! AND I GOT KISSED TWICE BY BRIAN DOBSON!!! OMG!!!

do you have any regret: Nope ^_^

sex or love: Love.

favorite smell: popcorn... or baking cookie smells...

what makes you mad: Bitches at my school.

favorite way to waste time: reading and listening to music... or writing... and roleplayin XD

best quality: Ummmm...

are in currently in love/lust: Yes.

what's the craziest thing you have ever done: Getting stoned.

do you find it hard to trust people: Yes, I've had my trust broken several times...

last thing you bought yourself: a backpack

bath or shower: Bath... just soak away your worries...

favorite season: Summer! I didn't get to see Willow... fudgsicles!

favorite color: Black, red, gold, silver, white.

favorite time of day: Night. I get to do naughty things without my parents looking over my shoulder then ^_^

gold or silver: both.

do you wear a watch:. I used to, but then I started babysitting and had to take it off.

do your friends know everything about you: If they did, I would probably have to do something about it.

last book you read: Hmmmm... Steel City Magic.

last movie you saw: Labirynth.

last movie you saw on the big screen: Hmmmm... I don't know, it's been a while.

last song you heard: Firebird by someone.

last time you showered: Yesterday morning. i'll have another one this afternoon.

last time you smiled: Last night.

last time you laughed: Yesterday. I was roleplaying with DV.

last person you hugged: I pounced on a bunch of people... does that count?

((( DO YOU )))

smoke: Ew?

do drugs: Gross.

drink: I wish.

have sex: Cybering, maybe.

sleep with stuffed animal: Sometimes.

believe in miracles: Yes.

consider yourself tolerant: Not towards bitches and assholes.

like the taste of alchohol: Yes.

believe in magic: Yes. And damned proud of it.

have any secrets: Everyone has secrets.

have any piercings: They kept getting infected...

have any tattoos: I want a tattoo...

hate yourself: Yea.

believe in witches: Some people call me a witch.

believe in ghosts: Yes. I wish my house was haunted so I can see one.

Wow... a lot of things have changed in the past year. Woohoo.

Qizzy stuff ^_^

Mon, 28 Aug 2006 19:20:37 GMT

I sort of stole this from Pher's journal XD Sorry Pher! *thoughful look* Though... he probably snatched this from someone's elses journal XD Oh well.

1. Are you in a relationship?
Sort of not really...

2. Do you hate more then 3 ppl?
Hmmm... I don't know. Probably a few people at school XD

3. How many houses have you lived in?
Two.

4. What is your favorite candy bar?
Reese Peanut Butter cups XD

5. What are your favorite shoes?
My gator shoes ^_^

6. Have you ever tripped someone?
Once or twice.

7. Favorite Summer Trip This Year?
Definetly going camping.

8. Do you have any siblings?
I'm fifth of 6 kids... so I have five siblings XD

9. Do you own a Britney Spears CD?
*eye twitch* Eeeeeeviiiiil...

10. Have you ever thrown up in public?
Yes... twice...

11. Name someone that's ALWAYS on your mind.
My brother Keiji

12. What is your favorite music genre?
Game

13. What is your sign?
Taurus

14. What time were you born?
Around 6:30am

15. Do you like beer?
Eeeeeew... Beer tastes like horse piss... not that I would know what horse piss tastes like, ya know?

16. Have you ever made a prank call?
Once... on my ex-boyfriend well before we started dating XD

17. What is the most embarrassing CD you own?
Probably my mix CD

18. Are you sarcastic?
Hmmm... most of the time. Yea...

19. What is your Favorite Color?
Black and red

20. How many watches do you own?
2. Don't wear either of them since I got out of the habit while babysitting.

22. Spring or fall?
Spring

23. What is your favorite color to wear?
Black and white

24. Pepsi or Sprite?
Sprite

25. What color is your cell phone?
If I had a cellphone, it would be crimson.

26. Wheres your second home?
My sister's girlfriend's.

27. Have you ever slapped someone?
Several times.

28. Have you ever had a cavity?
All the fucking time... pardon my language...

29. How many lamps are in your bedroom?
1.

30. How many video games do you own?
That I own personally? None. The family owns several though.

31. What was your first pet?
A snake named Ribbon.

32. Have you ever had braces?
I havn't, but I did have a retainer a while ago to push my top teeth out since I had an underbite. Eh heh heh... *sweatdrop*

34. Do you use Chapstick?
When I need it.

36. American Eagle or Abercrombie?
Ummmm... what?

37. Are you too forgiving?
No one can be too forgiving...

38. How Many Children Do You Want?
Well, I want twins, and a girl as well. So if I can manage to have all girls, I'll be happy... at least those I know what to deal with when they go through puberty...

39. Do you own something from Hot Topic?
What's that?

40. What is your favorite breakfast?
Toast.

41. Do you own a gun?
Nah... Daggers are more my specialty

42. What was the last thing you ate?
A chicken sandwich.

43. When was the last time you cried?
Oh god... when was the last time I cried... probably when my favorite character died...

44. What did you do 3 nights ago?
Went to a friend's house for a weekend-sleepover.

45. When was the last time you went to Olive Garden?
I've never been there.

46. Have you ever called your teacher mom?
Nope.

48. What are your nicknames?
Alaria, 'Layna, 'Laria, Kitten...

49. Do you know anyone named Bertha?
erm... Is this a trick question?

50. Have you ever been to Kentucky?
Nope.

51. Do you own something from Banana Republic?
Definetly not.

52. Are you thinking about somebody right now?
Yea, Keiji and Joey.

53. Have you ever called someone Boo?
*snort* Yea.

54. Do you smoke?
Eeeew...

55. Do you own a diamond ring?
I wish.

56. Are you happy with your life right now?
Pretty much.

57. Do you dye your hair?
Yes ^_^ I love my hair colour right now, it's black ^_^

58. Does anyone like you?
Of course.

59. Who's your best friend(s)?
Casey, Keiji, Joey, DV, the people on #nw

60. What were you doing May of 1994?
Hmmmm... I dont' remember.

61. Do you own a Backstreet Boys CD?
Definetly not.

62. McDonald's or Wendy's?
WENDY'S!! I won't get sick off their food...

63. Do you like yourself?
Of course I do! Who wouldn't?

64. Are you closer to your mother or father?
Mother

65. Whats the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Their eyes. Since eyes are the window to the soul.

66. Are you afraid of the dark?
That depends on how dark it is.

67. Have you ever eaten paste?
What's that?

68. Do you have a webcam?
Yea, and I'm not showing you it.

69. Have you ever stripped?
No.

70. What are you looking forward to the most this week?
Friday's camping trip ^_^